Saturday, November 26, 2011

Can We Please Talk About Hats and White Horses

Dear Bianca Jagger,
       I love you and your off the hook hats. Why are you so crazy? Also, can you come to my house on New Years riding a white horse just the way you did in 1977? That was freakin' awesome. So here's why I'm writing you this letter. Odd Twin has hats, and lots of them. I feel like you're missing out. I mean, the one that you're wearing on your head in this picture is obviously ridiculously marvelous, but it also looks like Ozzy Osbourne freaked out and threw a wild dove at your face after biting off its head. So, I really think you should come by. We've got a new selection of 1960's turban hats, 1950's feather hats, real and faux fur hats (because I know you love your animals), and a 1940's wide-brim sun hat that's waiting for you. I mean, why are you not shopping vintage these days? Bianca Jagger get your gorgeous ass in here.
Love,
OT


Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Halloweeeeenin'!!!

      Once upon a freaky time in a freaky fairy land full of freaky-ass dolls there was a little elf who wanted terribly to celebrate Halloween. He was small and green, with pointy shoes and a big gold hoop through his nose. He wore black and white striped socks, tan shorts and a 1970's leather vest which he wore open to expose his small elfish chest. On his left bicep was a sketch of a bikini wearing pin-up elfin lady and below her was the name "Queenie" in red ink.
      At the elf bar he went to he talked to Radcliff, the goblin bartender about his dream.
     "Rad," he wept, "I want nothing more than to celebrate this big-kid holiday. It screams my name in the night! Just look at the pumpkins. I design grapes that look like that! And I could use the candy corn like a skateboard. Oh, I could do so many things."
     "I know little friend," Radcliff said and poured him another serving of green saphire gin, "but it's too dangerous. Big people are all around and they won't see you. They'll step on you and swish you around from side to side. Believe me. You don't even have wings."
      And at the word "wings", the little elf perked up his pointy ears.
     "That's it!" he burped, "Radcliff, you're a genius! I know just where to get a pair of wings! There's a store in the Slope called Odd Twin! I look throught the windows at night, and sometimes I sneak under the door and try things on. They have the most wonderful things! Look at these shorts! They had a 1930's suede leather wallet that I took with me and made into shorts. I left them money on the counter before I snuck back out into the night. They will definitely have wings for me! Then I can fly around and listen to rock music on my i-pod and watch the children and their parents trick or treat from the tree-tops!"
      The little elf opened his pouch and tipped Radcliff, then marched out the swinging doors and headed into the night.
      When the store-keeper opened the door on Halloween day, she found a hundred dollar bill and a note that said "Keep the change sweetie...love, Johnny." The store-keepers husband just happened to have the same name and she thought it was a gift he had left her for their anniversary. She gushed and giggled and didn't even notice the small green pointed boot the small elf had left behind on the counter.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN! LOVE, ODD TWIN AND THE LITTLE GREEN ELF!

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

The Odd Twins

Odd Twin celebrates Diane Arbus today and everything related to art, creativity and especially vintage.  Arbus was known for her photographs of "freaks", but oddly enough one of her most famous portraits was of these two twins you see here. They are Cathleen and Colleen Wade of New Jersey. This photo has inspired many artists including Stanley Kubrick who mirrored "The Shining" after the photo. Arbus photographed the girls at a Christmas party in 1967 for twins and triplets. The twins father said that at the time he thought it was the worst depiction of the twins he had ever seen, but, that was because it wasn't your average Christmas photo. Diane Arbus was constantly asking questions about people in what we call "normal" society and people on the outskirts of society. She is famous for saying "A picture is a secret about a secret, the more it tells you, the less you know." Make sure to celebrate your differences and have an Odd Twin kind of day today.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Shake That Fanny

Look at Morena's face. She's looking across the street at the woman on line in the bank with a fanny pack on. Yep, that's what I said: FANNY PACK! Morena's like "Oh no she didn't with that fanny pack". It's a zebra design, with keys hanging off to one side. Let's not discuss the rest of the outfit. Morena said "Girl, google Fanny Pack and see what comes up." Ready kids? Don't try this at home:

OTHER NAMES FOR FANNY PACK:

* You're a Loser Pack
* Weird Al Pack
* Belt Pack
* Belly Pack
* Buffalo Pouch
* Hip Sack
* Waist Bag
* Bum Bag (U.K.)
* Cangurera (Mexico)
* Banano
* Moon Bag

Wikipedia says: The handiness and ease of opening of fanny packs has also resulted in them being used as holsters for handguns.

The reason people carry handguns in a fanny pack? So that when they realize they're wearing one, they can shoot themselves.

Thursday, August 18, 2011

"Death makes angels of us all and gives us wings where we had shoulders smooth as ravens claws."



Odd Twin is celebrating Jim Morrison today...just cuz we love him so. Here's what we've got in the store for celebration: Some wicked cool 60's bags....some bell bottoms for you gals...indian style 60's shirts...rad jewelry and more.


~The Opening of the Trunk~
-Moment of inner freedom
when the mind is opened & the
infinite universe revealed
& the soul is left to wander
dazed & confus’d searching
here & there for teachers & friends.
~~~
Moment of Freedom
as the prisoner
blinks in the sun
like a mole
from his hole
a child’s 1st trip
away from home
That moment of Freedom
~~~
-Jim Morrison

Thursday, July 28, 2011

Odd Twin and Ice Cream Cones

It was a humid morning on 5th and Degraw. Everything had slowed down. The traffic stood still. Little boys and girls gathered in front of Odd Twin letting their ice-cream cones melt.Deaf Dave was up  to his old tricks again. He had on his 1950's letter sweater, a pair of blue jeans rolled up at the bottom, and brown penny loafers. Behind his back he carried a small velvet box. The jingle jangle of wind chimes sounded when he entered the store alarming the mannequins.
"Hiya Dave!" Courtney shouted, "How are you?"
"Hey there Courtney! What's new? Why are you screaming?" Apparently Deaf Dave had remembered to put his hearing aid in that day and could hear everything just fine.
"Ooops, sorry Dave, I never know when you have that hearing gadget in...Soooo, what can I do ya for?" Courtney smiled.
"Well" Dave began, "I came to ask Helga out...."
"Dave," Courtney's face turned from happy to disturbed, "we've been through this before...Helga is not real...she's a mannequin."
Dave looked away "How dare you!" he said "I love her." He turned to Helga who was sitting by Bruce the male mannequin, "Look what I brought for you love!" He took the velvet box from behind his back and got down on one knee, "Helga, please, don't you remember our first kiss? Why must you refuse me?"
"Dave," Courtney scolded "your first kiss with Helga was at the Odd Twin anniversary party when you drank too much and fell on Helga by accident. Ever since then you've thought she was real...GET OVER IT!"
"How dare you Courtney!" Dave shouted, "Lies, all lies!" With that he threw the ring at Helga chipping the tip of her nose and ran out of the store, leaving one penny loafer behind.
Michael Jackson came on the stereo and Courtney looked at Helga "Don't worry doll," she said, "I'll touch up your nose later, let's try on some bathing suits and take pictures!"
Always a sexy day at Odd Twin.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Outsider?

Billy Joel. White Wedding...1980's...Sinead O' Connor. NOTHING COMPARES TO YOU!....These were the memories swimming through Debbie's head as she approached Odd Twin, a vintage store on 5th and Degraw  With her hair matted against her cheek, she remembered that line from The Outsiders: "They're thinking about putting me and Soda in a boys' home. No way! They ain't putting me in no boys' home" Why was she thinking of that line? She didn't know...what she DID know was that she needed A Mickey Mouse T-shirt that was identical to Emilio Estevez's. As she opened the door to Odd Twin, and the bells jingled their warm welcome she rushed towards the t-shirt rack, combed her hair into a rockabilly twist and saddled up to the counter with a Mickey tee in every color. "Hey there Pony Boy..." she snapped "how bout you charge me for my goods...or else." God she was weird. "Hey, why do you want all those tees?" I asked. "I'm gonna do it for Johnny man, " she cried, "I'm gonna do it for Johnny!!!!"
Thanks for shopping at Odd Twin Miss. You....are so strange but awesome.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Ramona's Magical Dress

One night Ramona couldn't sleep. She tried and tried, but Joey bear and Dee Dee Elephant pinched her nose. They were her favorite stuffed animals, but she was trying to sleep.
"Joey and Dee Dee stop it right now!" Ramona shouted. "You will wake Mommy and she will be very mad. She has so much work to do in the store tomorrow. There is going to be a big ball with princes and princesses, and they are all going to get their gowns at Mama's store."
Joey Bear's button eyes got wide "But Ramona" he said, "what will you wear?"
"Yes Ramona" Dee Dee Elephant chimed, "what will you ever wear? All of your pretty dresses have spit on them"
Ramona burped. Then she thought. Then she burped again. Then she laughed.
"I have an idea!" she smiled a toothless grin, "we will go through the vintage box of baby clothes Mama has in the basement. She is supposed to bring it to the store tomorrow before the ball, but I will find something beautiful and put it aside, and try not to pee on it."
Joey Bear and Dee Dee Elephant grinned. They LOVED Ramona's adventures.
She strapped on her guitar pillow and shouted "Hey, Oh, Let's Go!" With no hesitation, Joey Bear and Dee Dee Elephant were close behind.
They slid down banisters to the basement and played pirate games. They jumped on the clean laundry and bounced on Papa's stomach. He had fallen asleep watching television. They sang and laughed, and just before dawn, Joey Bear picked out a sweet pink dress with tiny doves flying around it. Dee Dee Elephant found ruffled panties that said "MOM" with a blue sewn in heart.
"Oh guys, you're the best! Mama will love it! And Papa will say I look like a princess and give me hugs and kisses!"
With that, they headed upstairs, fighting off imaginary dragons. Back in the crib, Ramona was so sleepy, she fell fast asleep, even though Joey Bear and Dee Dee Elephant were still pinching her nose.

Thursday, April 21, 2011

Easter Daze

The babies were out. They were out with their mommies who were quietly strolling them around in the spring breeze searching for the perfect Easter outfit. Sunday was approaching quickly. Soon enough they would be painting eggs and taking family pictures. The babies would have to look perfect! Like little peaches, or pumpkins, or daffodils. The Mommies came across Odd Twin. The saw the rack. The baby rack! There they were! All the baby Easter outfits they could dream of! The babies cooed and drooled and needed to be changed. But, the Mommies paid no mind. They were already at the register, purchasing the Sunday's best.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Odd Twin Invites You To Celebrate Fashion



Odd Twin's Favorite Fashion Quotes:

"Fashion is not something that exists in dresses only. Fashion is in the sky, in the street, fashion has to do with ideas, the way we live, what is happening." -Coco Chanel

"I dress for image. Not for myself, not for the public, not for fashion, not for men." -Marlene Dietrich

"Over the years I have learned that what is important in a dress is the woman who is wearing it." -Yves Saint Laurent

"I don't design clothes, I design dreams." -Ralph Lauren

"When in doubt, wear red." -Bill Blass

COME JOIN ODD TWIN ON APRIL 15TH FOR A NIGHT OF MUSIC, FASHION AND FRIENDS! CELEBRATING 2 YEARS IN THE 'HOOD!

Friday, April 1, 2011

Denver Gals Raise Your Hands!!

Two gals stopped in today from Denver...They saw Odd Twin in the recent issue of LUCKY....Two daughters and a Mama...The Mama liked the 1960 National Enquirer issue which says "Patricia Owens Tells Why...'MEN ARE IDIOTS'" This issue came out a week before she was born. Mama from Denver...Odd Twin gives you a shout out today! Thanks for visiting :) Please come check out our upcoming store windows...Mathew re-does them tonight...Deaf Dave should be in to molest Helga tomorrow.
Peace and love from the band xoxo
The Band

Thursday, March 24, 2011

ODD TWIN POEM #1

Spring is here,
get naked,
buy a jean jacket for your boyfriend at Odd Twin.
The patches sewed into the vintage jean material
say things like:
"beep, beep your ass!"
"if you got some last night, SMILE"

Odd Twin is smiling                                                            
So are the mannequins...
So am I....

Ah love,
an old Dolly Parton record,
a skinny tie,
you
me
the rip in my stocking.

Spring is near,
get naked,
buy that jean jacket,
the one he's been eying,
the one whispering
"Do unto others...THEN SPLIT!"

Friday, March 18, 2011

Helga, oh Helga, my Helgala

Deaf Dave was at it again. He walked the length of Fifth Avenue just to steal a glance, or maybe a kiss from Helga the Mannequin. He had on his best pressed suit which he had purchased from Odd Twin a year ago. It was also the day he first saw Helga. That fateful day she had been wearing a 1980's prom dress, fanning herself and showing off a slightly exposed bosom. Oh how Deaf Dave had wanted to steal her from that window and take her up to his apartment to show her his hand grenade collection. But, no, how could he? The window was where she belonged and she belonged not to him.
So, on his way in, he straightened his bow-tie and tried to look as nonchalant as possible.
"Hey Dave!" smiled Courtney from behind the steamer, a twinkle in her eye.
"Courtney!" Dave yelled, "Courtney! My goodness, why doesn't anyone say hello when I walk in this store..."
"I just said hi, Dave, didn't you hear me?" Courtney yelled.
"Heh?" out of his periphery vision he saw Helga checking out his rear end.
"Hey Courtney," Deaf Dave started again, "how much for Helga?"
"We've already been through this Dave..." Courtney sighed, "Helga is not for sale"
"I do not have a tail!" shouted Deaf Dave, "And I love her! I love her you hear? And today is our anniversary..." with that, Dave ran to Helga. He wanted to grab her, to tell her he loved her, that she should live with him and stand in his window and that way he could dress her (and undress her)...But instead Dave tripped over a silver Elton John Boot and landed in a basket of vintage scarves. A snicker appeared across the mannequins face. Dave was defeated.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Fly Boy and Odd Twin

     Odd Twin was chillin' on the corner of 5th and Degraw when Fly Kid From Brooklyn swung by. "Yo Ma, waddup?" Fly Kid sang, "That's a nice skirt you're wearin'...very 1950's...wanna go dancin' with me?" Odd Twin wasn't trying to be rude, she just hadn't noticed Fly Kid. She was too busy looking through a vintage Playboy article entitled:
"Horsing Them in with Hemingway". She loved the way the 1965 Playboy issue seemed so classy. She longed to be one of those women in the ads who say things like "The only trouble with a lounging outfit like this is that I hardly ever get a chance to lounge in it." Fly Kid looked away. He just wasn't sixties enough for her. He knew, he knew deep down that with his 1980's b-boy sunglasses and his gold name-plated earrings, they would never work. Finally, Odd Twin looked up. "Oh, hey Fly Kid from Brooklyn! Nice sneaks...I like your lightning laces..." Fly Kid's frown lilted up into a smile. Maybe, just maybe, if he grew out a thin mustache, slapped on a tie-clip and a pair of tight faded Levi's they could walk hand in hand through a Playboy paradise. Just then, Odd Twin's fake eyelash blew away in the breeze and she batted a green eye Fly Boy's way. Oh Thursday's in Brooklyn were simply their favorite days.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Oh Daddy, Get Real!

Matt and Clara stopped in today for some wingtips...Here's what happened:

"Daddy you have twelve pairs of shoes that look exactly like that!" Clara exclaimed. She had just finished a hectic full day of second grade. She flashed a pair of sparkly blue leggings, a pleated skirt and a jean vest over her smart t-shirt. Looking like a young Debbie Harry, she meant business.



"Clara," her father Matt said, "I know I have these shoes, but they are not THESE shoes. THESE shoes are brown, while the other twelve I have are black, white, black and white...I have shoes that are similar to these but...but...but...

Matt knew shoes. He knew vintage. He was a man with a mission.

How would he swing it? Clara would surely tell her mother...He knew! He would try and talk down the price.
"Clara" Matt said, "How much is a good price for me to be able to buy these shoes?"
"A dollar Daddy, now let's go!"
The salesgirls chuckled. Matt hung his head low.
"I'll be back when she's in school," he whispered, "they're mine, understand? All mine! They've always been mine!"
As he left the store, Bruce, the tall elegant mannequin winked and whispered "No lovely, they're actually mine"
He hi-fived Clara and they hummed the tune to "One Way or Another".

Thursday, March 10, 2011

Thursday At Odd Twin

     It was a rainy day at Odd Twin when Deaf Dave decided to drop in for a visit:

"Good Morning Dave!" shouted Courtney from the step-ladder. She was dusting the merchandise again, trying to get her mind off of the stalker who had been staring at her from across the street. Cleaning would certainly do the trick!
"Why doesn't anybody ever say hi to me when I come in! For cryin' out loud!" Dave put his umbrella down in a huff.
"I just said hi Dave," Courtney said.
"I'm not lookin' for a tie! I need a dress."
Courtney stopped dusting and looked up.
"Oh, heh, well, it's not for me, it's for my granddaughter. She's goin' to the prom and she wants something from the 1930's"
"Oh sure Dave, I can help you with that. What size?"
"For Christ's sake Courtney! I don't need any ties, I need a dress ya hear? A DRESS!" Dave had started to perspire under his lip.
        
       Courtney hurried to the back of the store where the finest merchandise was hung behind a red-velvet ribbon with a sign that read "please ask for assistance". These dresses were magical, she thought. They had all been worn at proms before and their magic fabric was sure to rub Dave's granddaughter the right way.
Also, the stalker was now at the front window and she thought she should make herself scarce.

"Here you are Dave...these dresses are amazing. Here's one that looks like Zelda Fitzgerald would have worn it. It's cut on the bias and has a silky pink fabric. It's a real flapper number."

"Heh?" Dave did not hear very well. He was also staring above Courtney's head at the silky bra's and slips hanging from a sailor cap. Dave had been a sailor in his day and his eyes glistened looking at the display.

The stalker had entered the store and was standing next to Dave.

"Hi Courtney" he said.
"Hi stalker man" Courtney replied in a friendly tone.
"I love you" the stalker was grinning.
"That's great." Courtney said "but I'm helping a customer right now. Do you need help with anything?"
The stalker, embarrassed, turned away and left the store in a rush knocking over Helga, the Russian mannequin. Helga's fabulous 80's skirt flew over her head exposing her plastic crotch which had been repaired with black electrical tape.
"Helga, nooooooo!" It was Dave, he ran to Helga and embraced her. He had put on one of the sailor hats from the display and was living out a twisted fantasy at the front of the store.
"So, should I wrap this for ya Dave?" Courtney asked.
"I'll take the dress Courtney, and I'll take a damn tie." Tears filled his eyes. "Courtney, is...is....is Helga for sale? It's just that, I think she's hurt and....uh..."
"Now Dave, we've been through this before. Helga is not for sale. Will that be cash or charge?"