Thursday, March 8, 2012
It was spring again. Tom Waits seemed to always be playing on the jukebox and the gals at Odd Twin giggled behind the counter as they tried on the new vintage cat-eye glasses and Easter bonnets. Elizabeth Butters contemplated her new spring wardrobe. Maybe the 1940's dupioni dress would be a good choice for her upcoming dinner events. "I need a cocktail" she thought.
Just then, Deaf Dave appeared at the window staring longingly at Helga the gorgeous Russian mannequin. "Helga", he whispered "Helga my love, I've come back!"
"Ummm..." Elizabeth spoke, "excuse me, creepy man talking to a statue, can I help you find anything today?"
Dave stepped into the store, gray wisps of his hair flying in the warm spring breeze.
"It's Helga" Dave wept. "I have to have her...I must! She will be mine!!"
"Ok," Elizabeth said, "just so you know we're having an end of winter sale, so everything is 20 percent off on the winter items"
"What about Helga?" Dave asked, "how much is Helga?"
Elizabeth fixed her lipstick in the mirror and said, "Helga's not for sale creepy man. She's not a winter item."
Deaf Dave beat the counter with his fists, and Elizabeth put him in the last dressing room and forced him to try on womens shoes (which were also 20 percent off).
Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Odd Twin has some questions for you:
1) What are you wearing?
2) What's your favorite movie?
3) What awesome stuff did you do on Valentine's Day?
Here are some of the answers to our own questions which, we'd really like to share with you:
Friday, February 3, 2012
It was a 65 degree winter in Park Slope and Irene, the newest store mannequin was livid. Mathew had dressed her in a white cashmere coat from the 1950's, blue stockings, a wool circle skirt and a silk 1940's blouse. The sun beat down on her and her wig frizzed. All of a sudden, in the distance, she saw it: A silhouette of fake boobs, a tight mini dress and big hair. "Could it be?" Irene gasped..."Is it really her?" All the mannequins looked up the block as a cool breeze began to blow and the door chimes chimed. All of a sudden, in the middle of Odd Twin stood the Goddess of Goddesses herself: Mariah Carey. Irene pulled her stockings up and froze into position.
Georgi was working the counter that day and had been a Mariah Carey fan since infancy. In sixth grade she had memorized the words to "Emotions" and dreamed of having big hair.
"hhh....hhhh....hello" Georgi said trying desperately to sound normal. "hhh...hhh...hhhhow can I help you today?"
"Hey girl," Mariah said, "I remember you."
"You do?" asked Georgi "but how?"
"You used to sing to my poster girl...I'm Mariah Carey...I know everything, but what I don't know is where I can find a lace tablecloth that's vintage"
"OMG Mariah! You've come to the right place! I have just the thing!!!" Georgi ran to the back of the store and pulled out three long lace tablecloths. Mariah quickly took all her clothes off and wrapped one around herself.
"This is soooo perfect!" she screeched and pulled out a diamond necklace to place around Georgi's neck.
After leaving Odd Twin, Irene let our a scream...Mariah had hit a high note and all the windows had broken. Come into Odd Twin, where we love Mariah.
Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Santa had been to Odd Twin again. It was after New Years Day and he had been looking at the 70's sweater in the window. Mrs. Clause was throwing an after-Christmas disco party and had told Chris to get a move on. He thought of only one place. He got there at three a.m. and Helga the mannequin let him in. "Thanks Helga, how are the vintage pumps I gave you for the holiday?" Helga froze back into her position at the window and didn't answer. They were too tight, but she couldn't bear to tell Santa. She would wear them and like them. She secretly had a thing for men in red suits with beards. Her father - a plus sized mannequin who was crushed when a snow plow went through the front window of Macy's - was wearing a Santa outfit when he was killed. Santa Clause was like a God to her.
Odd Twin has clothes from every era. Disco is a popular party theme and Francesca had already laid out merchandise for Santa to look at on the counter. He was the only one in the store because he wasn't to be seen by the masses and people started giving him early wishes for the next year when they saw him. He decided to go in the middle of the night for this reason. Also, he had been taking walks after he had eaten his share of Christmas cookies on the 24th.
Finally, he saw a pair of white polyester pants and a colorful shirt with a pointy collar. He had a pair of platforms at home that he had borrowed from one of the elves and a big gold chain left for him one year from Versace under the chimney. He paid in candy canes and love. After trying the outfit on, he walked up to Helga again. "Hey Helgey, what do you think?" Helga wouldn't look, she couldn't. Every time Santa visited she was grief-stricken. But, as he walked away she caught a glimpse of him and a tear fell to her cheek. "Oh, Daddy would have looked rad in 70's duds." she thought to herself.
Santa's big pot belly fell over his white trousers, but Mrs. Clause would be satisfied with his purchase. He had to lose forty pounds before the next Christmas and so a disco party was a great way for him to exercise. "Later Odd Twin," he called to the store as he hopped on his sleigh. Rudolph put ABBA on the i-pod and they flew away.
The next morning when the store opened, Helga was holding a red hat with a white fur lining, and the store workers could have sworn they heard her singing the Beegees.