Halloweeeeenin'!!!

      Once upon a freaky time in a freaky fairy land full of freaky-ass dolls there was a little elf who wanted terribly to celebrate Halloween. He was small and green, with pointy shoes and a big gold hoop through his nose. He wore black and white striped socks, tan shorts and a 1970's leather vest which he wore open to expose his small elfish chest. On his left bicep was a sketch of a bikini wearing pin-up elfin lady and below her was the name "Queenie" in red ink.
      At the elf bar he went to he talked to Radcliff, the goblin bartender about his dream.
     "Rad," he wept, "I want nothing more than to celebrate this big-kid holiday. It screams my name in the night! Just look at the pumpkins. I design grapes that look like that! And I could use the candy corn like a skateboard. Oh, I could do so many things."
     "I know little friend," Radcliff said and poured him another serving of green saphire gin, "but it's too dangerous. Big people are all around and they won't see you. They'll step on you and swish you around from side to side. Believe me. You don't even have wings."
      And at the word "wings", the little elf perked up his pointy ears.

     "That's it!" he burped, "Radcliff, you're a genius! I know just where to get a pair of wings! There's a store in the Slope called Odd Twin! I look throught the windows at night, and sometimes I sneak under the door and try things on. They have the most wonderful things! Look at these shorts! They had a 1930's suede leather wallet that I took with me and made into shorts. I left them money on the counter before I snuck back out into the night. They will definitely have wings for me! Then I can fly around and listen to rock music on my i-pod and watch the children and their parents trick or treat from the tree-tops!"
      The little elf opened his pouch and tipped Radcliff, then marched out the swinging doors and headed into the night.
      When the store-keeper opened the door on Halloween day, she found a hundred dollar bill and a note that said "Keep the change sweetie...love, Johnny." The store-keepers husband just happened to have the same name and she thought it was a gift he had left her for their anniversary. She gushed and giggled and didn't even notice the small green pointed boot the small elf had left behind on the counter.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN! LOVE, ODD TWIN AND THE LITTLE GREEN ELF!

The Odd Twins

 

Odd Twin celebrates Diane Arbus today and everything related to art, creativity and especially vintage.  Arbus was known for her photographs of "freaks", but oddly enough one of her most famous portraits was of these two twins you see here. They are Cathleen and Colleen Wade of New Jersey. This photo has inspired many artists including Stanley Kubrick who mirrored "The Shining" after the photo. Arbus photographed the girls at a Christmas party in 1967 for twins and triplets. The twins father said that at the time he thought it was the worst depiction of the twins he had ever seen, but, that was because it wasn't your average Christmas photo. Diane Arbus was constantly asking questions about people in what we call "normal" society and people on the outskirts of society. She is famous for saying "A picture is a secret about a secret, the more it tells you, the less you know." Make sure to celebrate your differences and have an Odd Twin kind of day today.

Shake That Fanny

Look at Morena's face. She's looking across the street at the woman on line in the bank with a fanny pack on. Yep, that's what I said: FANNY PACK! Morena's like "Oh no she didn't with that fanny pack". It's a zebra design, with keys hanging off to one side. Let's not discuss the rest of the outfit. Morena said "Girl, google Fanny Pack and see what comes up." Ready kids? Don't try this at home:

OTHER NAMES FOR FANNY PACK:

* You're a Loser Pack
* Weird Al Pack
* Belt Pack
* Belly Pack
* Buffalo Pouch
* Hip Sack
* Waist Bag
* Bum Bag (U.K.)
* Cangurera (Mexico)
* Banano
* Moon Bag

Wikipedia says: The handiness and ease of opening of fanny packs has also resulted in them being used as holsters for handguns.

The reason people carry handguns in a fanny pack? So that when they realize they're wearing one, they can shoot themselves.

"Death makes angels of us all and gives us wings where we had shoulders smooth as ravens claws."

Odd Twin is celebrating Jim Morrison today...just cuz we love him so. Here's what we've got in the store for celebration: Some wicked cool 60's bags....some bell bottoms for you gals...indian style 60's shirts...rad jewelry and more.

~The Opening of the Trunk~

-Moment of inner freedom
when the mind is opened & the
infinite universe revealed
& the soul is left to wander
dazed & confus’d searching
here & there for teachers & friends.
~~~

Moment of Freedom
as the prisoner
blinks in the sun
like a mole
from his hole

a child’s 1st trip
away from home

That moment of Freedom
~~~

-Jim Morrison

Odd Twin and Ice Cream Cones

It was a humid morning on 5th and Degraw. Everything had slowed down. The traffic stood still. Little boys and girls gathered in front of Odd Twin letting their ice-cream cones melt.Deaf Dave was up  to his old tricks again. He had on his 1950's letter sweater, a pair of blue jeans rolled up at the bottom, and brown penny loafers. Behind his back he carried a small velvet box. The jingle jangle of wind chimes sounded when he entered the store alarming the mannequins.
"Hiya Dave!" Courtney shouted, "How are you?"
"Hey there Courtney! What's new? Why are you screaming?" Apparently Deaf Dave had remembered to put his hearing aid in that day and could hear everything just fine.
"Ooops, sorry Dave, I never know when you have that hearing gadget in...Soooo, what can I do ya for?" Courtney smiled.
"Well" Dave began, "I came to ask Helga out...."
"Dave," Courtney's face turned from happy to disturbed, "we've been through this before...Helga is not real...she's a mannequin."
Dave looked away "How dare you!" he said "I love her." He turned to Helga who was sitting by Bruce the male mannequin, "Look what I brought for you love!" He took the velvet box from behind his back and got down on one knee, "Helga, please, don't you remember our first kiss? Why must you refuse me?"
"Dave," Courtney scolded "your first kiss with Helga was at the Odd Twin anniversary party when you drank too much and fell on Helga by accident. Ever since then you've thought she was real...GET OVER IT!"
"How dare you Courtney!" Dave shouted, "Lies, all lies!" With that he threw the ring at Helga chipping the tip of her nose and ran out of the store, leaving one penny loafer behind.
Michael Jackson came on the stereo and Courtney looked at Helga "Don't worry doll," she said, "I'll touch up your nose later, let's try on some bathing suits and take pictures!"

Always a sexy day at Odd Twin.

Outsider?

Billy Joel. White Wedding...1980's...Sinead O' Connor. NOTHING COMPARES TO YOU!....These were the memories swimming through Debbie's head as she approached Odd Twin, a vintage store on 5th and Degraw  With her hair matted against her cheek, she remembered that line from The Outsiders: "They're thinking about putting me and Soda in a boys' home. No way! They ain't putting me in no boys' home" Why was she thinking of that line? She didn't know...what she DID know was that she needed A Mickey Mouse T-shirt that was identical to Emilio Estevez's. As she opened the door to Odd Twin, and the bells jingled their warm welcome she rushed towards the t-shirt rack, combed her hair into a rockabilly twist and saddled up to the counter with a Mickey tee in every color. "Hey there Pony Boy..." she snapped "how bout you charge me for my goods...or else." God she was weird. "Hey, why do you want all those tees?" I asked. "I'm gonna do it for Johnny man, " she cried, "I'm gonna do it for Johnny!!!!"
Thanks for shopping at Odd Twin Miss. You....are so strange but awesome.

Ramona's Magical Dress

One night Ramona couldn't sleep. She tried and tried, but Joey bear and Dee Dee Elephant pinched her nose. They were her favorite stuffed animals, but she was trying to sleep.
"Joey and Dee Dee stop it right now!" Ramona shouted. "You will wake Mommy and she will be very mad. She has so much work to do in the store tomorrow. There is going to be a big ball with princes and princesses, and they are all going to get their gowns at Mama's store."
Joey Bear's button eyes got wide "But Ramona" he said, "what will you wear?"
"Yes Ramona" Dee Dee Elephant chimed, "what will you ever wear? All of your pretty dresses have spit on them"
Ramona burped. Then she thought. Then she burped again. Then she laughed.
"I have an idea!" she smiled a toothless grin, "we will go through the vintage box of baby clothes Mama has in the basement. She is supposed to bring it to the store tomorrow before the ball, but I will find something beautiful and put it aside, and try not to pee on it."
Joey Bear and Dee Dee Elephant grinned. They LOVED Ramona's adventures.
She strapped on her guitar pillow and shouted "Hey, Oh, Let's Go!" With no hesitation, Joey Bear and Dee Dee Elephant were close behind.
They slid down banisters to the basement and played pirate games. They jumped on the clean laundry and bounced on Papa's stomach. He had fallen asleep watching television. They sang and laughed, and just before dawn, Joey Bear picked out a sweet pink dress with tiny doves flying around it. Dee Dee Elephant found ruffled panties that said "MOM" with a blue sewn in heart.
"Oh guys, you're the best! Mama will love it! And Papa will say I look like a princess and give me hugs and kisses!"
With that, they headed upstairs, fighting off imaginary dragons. Back in the crib, Ramona was so sleepy, she fell fast asleep, even though Joey Bear and Dee Dee Elephant were still pinching her nose.