Ring in the New Year Disco Style

        Santa had been to Odd Twin again. It was after New Years Day and he had been looking at the 70's sweater in the window. Mrs. Clause was throwing an after-Christmas disco party and had told Chris to get a move on. He thought of only one place. He got there at three a.m. and Helga the mannequin let him in. "Thanks Helga, how are the vintage pumps I gave you for the holiday?" Helga froze back into her position at the window and didn't answer. They were too tight, but she couldn't bear to tell Santa. She would wear them and like them. She secretly had a thing for men in red suits with beards. Her father - a plus sized mannequin who was crushed when a snow plow went through the front window of Macy's - was wearing a Santa outfit when he was killed. Santa Clause was like a God to her.
         Odd Twin has clothes from every era. Disco is a popular party theme and Francesca had already laid out merchandise for Santa to look at on the counter. He was the only one in the store because he wasn't to be seen by the masses and people started giving him early wishes for the next year when they saw him. He decided to go in the middle of the night for this reason. Also, he had been taking walks after he had eaten his share of Christmas cookies on the 24th.
         Finally, he saw a pair of white polyester pants and a colorful shirt with a pointy collar. He had a pair of platforms at home that he had borrowed from one of the elves and a big gold chain left for him one year from Versace under the chimney. He paid in candy canes and love. After trying the outfit on, he walked up to Helga again. "Hey Helgey, what do you think?" Helga wouldn't look, she couldn't. Every time Santa visited she was grief-stricken. But, as he walked away she caught a glimpse of him and a tear fell to her cheek. "Oh, Daddy would have looked rad in 70's duds." she thought to herself.
        Santa's big pot belly fell over his white trousers, but Mrs. Clause would be satisfied with his purchase. He had to lose forty pounds before the next Christmas and so a disco party was a great way for him to exercise. "Later Odd Twin," he called to the store as he hopped on his sleigh. Rudolph put ABBA on the i-pod and they flew away.
        The next morning when the store opened, Helga was holding a red hat with a white fur lining, and the store workers could have sworn they heard her singing the Beegees.

Can We Please Talk About Hats and White Horses

Dear Bianca Jagger,
       I love you and your off the hook hats. Why are you so crazy? Also, can you come to my house on New Years riding a white horse just the way you did in 1977? That was freakin' awesome. So here's why I'm writing you this letter. Odd Twin has hats, and lots of them. I feel like you're missing out. I mean, the one that you're wearing on your head in this picture is obviously ridiculously marvelous, but it also looks like Ozzy Osbourne freaked out and threw a wild dove at your face after biting off its head. So, I really think you should come by. We've got a new selection of 1960's turban hats, 1950's feather hats, real and faux fur hats (because I know you love your animals), and a 1940's wide-brim sun hat that's waiting for you. I mean, why are you not shopping vintage these days? Bianca Jagger get your gorgeous ass in here.
Love,
OT

Halloweeeeenin'!!!

      Once upon a freaky time in a freaky fairy land full of freaky-ass dolls there was a little elf who wanted terribly to celebrate Halloween. He was small and green, with pointy shoes and a big gold hoop through his nose. He wore black and white striped socks, tan shorts and a 1970's leather vest which he wore open to expose his small elfish chest. On his left bicep was a sketch of a bikini wearing pin-up elfin lady and below her was the name "Queenie" in red ink.
      At the elf bar he went to he talked to Radcliff, the goblin bartender about his dream.
     "Rad," he wept, "I want nothing more than to celebrate this big-kid holiday. It screams my name in the night! Just look at the pumpkins. I design grapes that look like that! And I could use the candy corn like a skateboard. Oh, I could do so many things."
     "I know little friend," Radcliff said and poured him another serving of green saphire gin, "but it's too dangerous. Big people are all around and they won't see you. They'll step on you and swish you around from side to side. Believe me. You don't even have wings."
      And at the word "wings", the little elf perked up his pointy ears.

     "That's it!" he burped, "Radcliff, you're a genius! I know just where to get a pair of wings! There's a store in the Slope called Odd Twin! I look throught the windows at night, and sometimes I sneak under the door and try things on. They have the most wonderful things! Look at these shorts! They had a 1930's suede leather wallet that I took with me and made into shorts. I left them money on the counter before I snuck back out into the night. They will definitely have wings for me! Then I can fly around and listen to rock music on my i-pod and watch the children and their parents trick or treat from the tree-tops!"
      The little elf opened his pouch and tipped Radcliff, then marched out the swinging doors and headed into the night.
      When the store-keeper opened the door on Halloween day, she found a hundred dollar bill and a note that said "Keep the change sweetie...love, Johnny." The store-keepers husband just happened to have the same name and she thought it was a gift he had left her for their anniversary. She gushed and giggled and didn't even notice the small green pointed boot the small elf had left behind on the counter.
HAPPY HALLOWEEN! LOVE, ODD TWIN AND THE LITTLE GREEN ELF!

The Odd Twins

 

Odd Twin celebrates Diane Arbus today and everything related to art, creativity and especially vintage.  Arbus was known for her photographs of "freaks", but oddly enough one of her most famous portraits was of these two twins you see here. They are Cathleen and Colleen Wade of New Jersey. This photo has inspired many artists including Stanley Kubrick who mirrored "The Shining" after the photo. Arbus photographed the girls at a Christmas party in 1967 for twins and triplets. The twins father said that at the time he thought it was the worst depiction of the twins he had ever seen, but, that was because it wasn't your average Christmas photo. Diane Arbus was constantly asking questions about people in what we call "normal" society and people on the outskirts of society. She is famous for saying "A picture is a secret about a secret, the more it tells you, the less you know." Make sure to celebrate your differences and have an Odd Twin kind of day today.

Shake That Fanny

Look at Morena's face. She's looking across the street at the woman on line in the bank with a fanny pack on. Yep, that's what I said: FANNY PACK! Morena's like "Oh no she didn't with that fanny pack". It's a zebra design, with keys hanging off to one side. Let's not discuss the rest of the outfit. Morena said "Girl, google Fanny Pack and see what comes up." Ready kids? Don't try this at home:

OTHER NAMES FOR FANNY PACK:

* You're a Loser Pack
* Weird Al Pack
* Belt Pack
* Belly Pack
* Buffalo Pouch
* Hip Sack
* Waist Bag
* Bum Bag (U.K.)
* Cangurera (Mexico)
* Banano
* Moon Bag

Wikipedia says: The handiness and ease of opening of fanny packs has also resulted in them being used as holsters for handguns.

The reason people carry handguns in a fanny pack? So that when they realize they're wearing one, they can shoot themselves.

"Death makes angels of us all and gives us wings where we had shoulders smooth as ravens claws."

Odd Twin is celebrating Jim Morrison today...just cuz we love him so. Here's what we've got in the store for celebration: Some wicked cool 60's bags....some bell bottoms for you gals...indian style 60's shirts...rad jewelry and more.

~The Opening of the Trunk~

-Moment of inner freedom
when the mind is opened & the
infinite universe revealed
& the soul is left to wander
dazed & confus’d searching
here & there for teachers & friends.
~~~

Moment of Freedom
as the prisoner
blinks in the sun
like a mole
from his hole

a child’s 1st trip
away from home

That moment of Freedom
~~~

-Jim Morrison

Odd Twin and Ice Cream Cones

It was a humid morning on 5th and Degraw. Everything had slowed down. The traffic stood still. Little boys and girls gathered in front of Odd Twin letting their ice-cream cones melt.Deaf Dave was up  to his old tricks again. He had on his 1950's letter sweater, a pair of blue jeans rolled up at the bottom, and brown penny loafers. Behind his back he carried a small velvet box. The jingle jangle of wind chimes sounded when he entered the store alarming the mannequins.
"Hiya Dave!" Courtney shouted, "How are you?"
"Hey there Courtney! What's new? Why are you screaming?" Apparently Deaf Dave had remembered to put his hearing aid in that day and could hear everything just fine.
"Ooops, sorry Dave, I never know when you have that hearing gadget in...Soooo, what can I do ya for?" Courtney smiled.
"Well" Dave began, "I came to ask Helga out...."
"Dave," Courtney's face turned from happy to disturbed, "we've been through this before...Helga is not real...she's a mannequin."
Dave looked away "How dare you!" he said "I love her." He turned to Helga who was sitting by Bruce the male mannequin, "Look what I brought for you love!" He took the velvet box from behind his back and got down on one knee, "Helga, please, don't you remember our first kiss? Why must you refuse me?"
"Dave," Courtney scolded "your first kiss with Helga was at the Odd Twin anniversary party when you drank too much and fell on Helga by accident. Ever since then you've thought she was real...GET OVER IT!"
"How dare you Courtney!" Dave shouted, "Lies, all lies!" With that he threw the ring at Helga chipping the tip of her nose and ran out of the store, leaving one penny loafer behind.
Michael Jackson came on the stereo and Courtney looked at Helga "Don't worry doll," she said, "I'll touch up your nose later, let's try on some bathing suits and take pictures!"

Always a sexy day at Odd Twin.