Thursday, July 28, 2011

Odd Twin and Ice Cream Cones

It was a humid morning on 5th and Degraw. Everything had slowed down. The traffic stood still. Little boys and girls gathered in front of Odd Twin letting their ice-cream cones melt.Deaf Dave was up  to his old tricks again. He had on his 1950's letter sweater, a pair of blue jeans rolled up at the bottom, and brown penny loafers. Behind his back he carried a small velvet box. The jingle jangle of wind chimes sounded when he entered the store alarming the mannequins.
"Hiya Dave!" Courtney shouted, "How are you?"
"Hey there Courtney! What's new? Why are you screaming?" Apparently Deaf Dave had remembered to put his hearing aid in that day and could hear everything just fine.
"Ooops, sorry Dave, I never know when you have that hearing gadget in...Soooo, what can I do ya for?" Courtney smiled.
"Well" Dave began, "I came to ask Helga out...."
"Dave," Courtney's face turned from happy to disturbed, "we've been through this before...Helga is not real...she's a mannequin."
Dave looked away "How dare you!" he said "I love her." He turned to Helga who was sitting by Bruce the male mannequin, "Look what I brought for you love!" He took the velvet box from behind his back and got down on one knee, "Helga, please, don't you remember our first kiss? Why must you refuse me?"
"Dave," Courtney scolded "your first kiss with Helga was at the Odd Twin anniversary party when you drank too much and fell on Helga by accident. Ever since then you've thought she was real...GET OVER IT!"
"How dare you Courtney!" Dave shouted, "Lies, all lies!" With that he threw the ring at Helga chipping the tip of her nose and ran out of the store, leaving one penny loafer behind.
Michael Jackson came on the stereo and Courtney looked at Helga "Don't worry doll," she said, "I'll touch up your nose later, let's try on some bathing suits and take pictures!"
Always a sexy day at Odd Twin.

Friday, July 1, 2011


Billy Joel. White Wedding...1980's...Sinead O' Connor. NOTHING COMPARES TO YOU!....These were the memories swimming through Debbie's head as she approached Odd Twin, a vintage store on 5th and Degraw  With her hair matted against her cheek, she remembered that line from The Outsiders: "They're thinking about putting me and Soda in a boys' home. No way! They ain't putting me in no boys' home" Why was she thinking of that line? She didn't know...what she DID know was that she needed A Mickey Mouse T-shirt that was identical to Emilio Estevez's. As she opened the door to Odd Twin, and the bells jingled their warm welcome she rushed towards the t-shirt rack, combed her hair into a rockabilly twist and saddled up to the counter with a Mickey tee in every color. "Hey there Pony Boy..." she snapped "how bout you charge me for my goods...or else." God she was weird. "Hey, why do you want all those tees?" I asked. "I'm gonna do it for Johnny man, " she cried, "I'm gonna do it for Johnny!!!!"
Thanks for shopping at Odd Twin Miss. You....are so strange but awesome.