Friday, March 18, 2011

Helga, oh Helga, my Helgala

Deaf Dave was at it again. He walked the length of Fifth Avenue just to steal a glance, or maybe a kiss from Helga the Mannequin. He had on his best pressed suit which he had purchased from Odd Twin a year ago. It was also the day he first saw Helga. That fateful day she had been wearing a 1980's prom dress, fanning herself and showing off a slightly exposed bosom. Oh how Deaf Dave had wanted to steal her from that window and take her up to his apartment to show her his hand grenade collection. But, no, how could he? The window was where she belonged and she belonged not to him.
So, on his way in, he straightened his bow-tie and tried to look as nonchalant as possible.
"Hey Dave!" smiled Courtney from behind the steamer, a twinkle in her eye.
"Courtney!" Dave yelled, "Courtney! My goodness, why doesn't anyone say hello when I walk in this store..."
"I just said hi, Dave, didn't you hear me?" Courtney yelled.
"Heh?" out of his periphery vision he saw Helga checking out his rear end.
"Hey Courtney," Deaf Dave started again, "how much for Helga?"
"We've already been through this Dave..." Courtney sighed, "Helga is not for sale"
"I do not have a tail!" shouted Deaf Dave, "And I love her! I love her you hear? And today is our anniversary..." with that, Dave ran to Helga. He wanted to grab her, to tell her he loved her, that she should live with him and stand in his window and that way he could dress her (and undress her)...But instead Dave tripped over a silver Elton John Boot and landed in a basket of vintage scarves. A snicker appeared across the mannequins face. Dave was defeated.

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